“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us,” Jesus taught us to pray. And by telling us to pray this way, the Lord makes it our duty to always forgive those who have done us wrong. If this seems impossible, given the terrible circumstances in which you’ve been wounded, know that the Lord always gives us the grace to fulfill His commandments, even when carrying them out seems completely impossible.
Forgiving in the hope of reconciliation beyond death
Often we can forgive and reconcile — that is what we hope for. But when reconciliation seems truly impossible on Earth — because of the violence of the wound or the rupture — we can only forgive in the hope of reconciliation beyond death; here all will be totally transformed.
Learn to respect each person’s path
It goes without saying that it is much easier to forgive when you have had the wonderful experience of being forgiven yourself. Hence the importance of teaching children to ask forgiveness for their disobedience and stubbornness, so that having tasted the joy of being forgiven at a very young age, they do not hesitate to ask for forgiveness later on if they commit a big mistake. On the other hand, how many adults confess that, in their youth, their “apologies” were accepted, but that they had never been taught to really recognize their own faults!
Finally, for people who have been terribly humiliated, we should avoid citing examples of forgiveness that may seem “heroic” to us, but for them seem infinitely easier than the forgiveness they will one day have to grant. Thus, we should try to respect each person’s journey. We should not blame those who need a long time for their hearts to mature into the difficult and wonderful forgiveness they will one day be able to grant.
Abbot Pierre Descouvemont
Read more:
8 Bible verses about God’s forgiveness