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Being a parent means constantly questioning if you’re doing the right thing — rest assured, if you’ve got teens, they’re probably telling you that you’re failing, big time! And while you are questioning yourself, you might also be getting confused with all the modern parenting styles and myriad of advice out there.
From helicopter parenting, where a parent hovers over their child and is there in a second the minute something goes wrong, to lighthouse parenting, where parents permanently act as a guiding light for their children, there’s no one perfect style for all children.
Therefore, we thought we’d abandon modern parenting styles and look to the saints. These are just a handful of the holy men and women who brought their children up in oft-difficult circumstances to be individuals of tremendous faith. As you’ll see, we could all take inspiration from the message of their consistent parenting.
1
St. Monica
The 4th-century saint spent years praying for her wayward son, St. Augustine, but she often nagged him and seemed to smother him with her religious concerns. At one point, Augustine fled to Rome without telling her, and she followed him! Helicopter parenting, at its best!
However, she obviously knew her child, Augustine later became one of the greatest theologians in history, crediting his mother’s unwavering prayers and example for his conversion. Her persistent love, even when Augustine actively rebelled, showed a profound dedication to her child’s ultimate good. Talk about tough love!
2
St. Louis IX of France
As King of France, Louis seemed to prioritize ruling a country and fighting in crusades over being a hands-on dad. Plus, he was very strict. His letters to his son read like a royal self-help manual: “Don’t hang out with sinners, avoid luxurious clothes, and pray a lot.” No cuddles or bedtime stories here.
Yet, Louis was so much more than just a disciplinarian; he modeled integrity, faith, and service. He personally helped the poor and brought a deep sense of justice to his reign. His “tough but fair” parenting approach equipped his son to be a responsible ruler. Sometimes, love looks like setting the bar high!
3
St. Thomas More
Thomas More was so busy defending his faith and opposing King Henry VIII that he got himself imprisoned and executed, leaving his family to fend for themselves. That’s a rough career move for a family man, and may certainly leave his children questioning his love for them.
This doubt could be put to rest just by reading Thomas’s letters from the Tower of London. They reveal a deeply loving father who constantly encouraged his children to stay strong in faith and virtue. He raised daughters like Margaret to be brilliant, educated women — rare for the time. His commitment to conscience over convenience left a legacy of courage and integrity that still inspires.
4
St. Gianna Beretta Molla
Gianna made what might seem a controversial decision by many during her pregnancy to prioritize her unborn baby’s life over her own health. This brave decision ultimately cost her her life. Some might argue it was a reckless choice, leaving her other young children motherless.
However, Gianna’s self-sacrifice embodied the ultimate expression of maternal love. Her husband and children grew up treasuring her memory as a saintly mother who lived — and died — faithful to her values. Her story is a testament to courage, even when the stakes are unimaginably high.
5
St. Zélie Martin
Zélie was a no-nonsense businesswoman who ran a lace-making enterprise while raising nine children (four of whom died young). She could be strict, even blunt, and wasn’t afraid to tell her kids when they were slacking.
She and her husband, Louis, created a home filled with faith, love, and encouragement. One of her daughters, Thérèse, grew up to be one of the most beloved saints of all time, St. Thérèse of Lisieux. Zélie’s balance of discipline and affection helped raise a future Doctor of the Church — proof that tough love works when paired with faith and kindness.
6
St. Augustine of Hippo
Augustine had a son, Adeodatus (meaning Gift from God), out of wedlock before his conversion. He wasn’t exactly “Father of the Year” material early on, given his wayward lifestyle and philosophical distractions.
After his dramatic conversion, Augustine became a devoted father, teacher, and spiritual guide to his son. Adeodatus, though he died young, shared Augustine’s faith and brilliance. Augustine’s transformation shows that even flawed beginnings can lead to saintly outcomes.