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10 Ways to navigate wedding prep with your mother-in-law

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Cerith Gardiner - published on 06/28/24

If your future mother-in-law is a little intrusive, here are some top tips to get along and even improve your relationship!

Preparing for a wedding is a joyous yet often stressful time, and the dynamics between a bride-to-be and her mother-in-law can add an extra layer of complexity. It’s common for mothers-in-law to be overly enthusiastic during this period, which can sometimes lead to misunderstandings or tension.

However, maintaining a good relationship with your mother-in-law is crucial, not just for the wedding day, but for the long-term harmony of your family. A respectful and light-hearted approach can help navigate this delicate situation, ensuring that your big day is as beautiful and memorable as you’ve always dreamed.

1
Involve Her in Specific Tasks

Assign her meaningful but manageable tasks that align with her interests. For example, if she loves baking, ask her to oversee the dessert table. This way, she feels valued without overwhelming the planning process.

2
Set Clear Boundaries Gently

Have a heart-to-heart conversation where you express your gratitude for her enthusiasm and gently outline the areas where you and your partner would like to have the final say. Emphasize that her support means a lot to you.

3
Create a Special Role for Her

Designate a unique role for her on the wedding day, such as giving a reading or participating in a special ceremony. This helps her feel included and important, satisfying her desire to be involved.

4
Share Regular Updates

Keep her in the loop with regular updates on the wedding plans. This can be through a regular phone call or a shared online document. It shows that you value her input while keeping the control over the decision-making process.

5
Utilize Her Strengths

Recognize her strengths and utilize them in the planning. If she’s great at organizing, let her help with the seating arrangements. If she has a knack for decoration, involve her in the decor planning.

6
Stay Calm and Positive

Whenever her enthusiasm feels overwhelming, take a deep breath and stay calm. Respond with positivity and gratitude. A light-hearted approach can diffuse tension and make her feel appreciated.

7
Seek Advice on Sensitive Issues

For delicate topics, like guest lists or family traditions, seek her advice and show genuine interest in her suggestions. Even if you don’t follow all her advice, she’ll appreciate being consulted.

8
Schedule a “Mom Day”

Plan a day where you and your mother-in-law can spend time together doing something unrelated to the wedding. This helps strengthen your bond and shows her that you value her company beyond the wedding preparations.

9
Delegate Communication to Your Partner

If certain discussions feel too challenging, let your husband-to-be handle them. Sometimes, it’s easier for her to hear things from her child, and it can help in maintaining a balanced relationship.

10
Practice Patience and Humor

Use humor to lighten the mood when things get tense. A good laugh can help everyone take a step back and realize the bigger picture – that the wedding is about love and unity.

    Navigating the excitement and involvement of a mother-in-law in wedding preparations requires a balance of respect, patience, and clear communication. By involving her in specific tasks, setting gentle boundaries, and appreciating her enthusiasm, you can ensure a harmonious and joyful journey to your wedding day.

    Remember, the goal is to build a loving and supportive family environment, starting with a wedding that celebrates not just the union of two people, but the blending of two families.

    Tags:
    FamilyRelationshipsWeddings
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