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A Franciscan and a Jesuit were close friends since the days in which they had both been novices. They were both smokers, and found it difficult to pray or study for more than an hour without having a “ciggie break.” Faced with such difficulty, they decided to go to their superiors and ask them for permission to smoke.
When they met again, the Franciscan was somehow conflicted: “I asked my superior if I could smoke while I pray and he said I couldn’t,” he told the Jesuit.
“You asked the wrong question, my friend,” the Jesuit replied. “I asked mine if I could pray while I smoke. He said ‘of course!’”
***
A Franciscan, a Dominican, and a Jesuit were sitting together, studying in a room, when suddenly the lights went out.
“My brothers, let us take this opportunity to meditate on how much we owe to our sister, the light, a gift from our Lord,” the Franciscan said.
“Yes, but let us also take this opportunity to think deeply and write on the difference between light and dark,” the Dominican added.
Meanwhile, the Jesuit went to the basement, found the fuse box, and reset the breaker.
***
A man was having a conversation with God:
Man: What is a million years like to you, O God?
God: Like one second, my son.
Man: What is a million dollars like to you, my Lord?
God: Like one penny, my son.
Man: Can you lend me a “penny”?
God: Sure! Just a second …